Where's the Silver Lining?

I might delete this soon when I realise how stupid this post will sound. But for now... Recently my life's been quite chaotic. Its been anti-climatic since the last exam. Looking back, I realised that much has changed.

Things change, people change but somehow I feel left behind. Like a broken record. Just recently, I've learned a lot about what people in general think of me and some of it isn't good.

It seems that some people's first impression of me being pretentious and dislike me in general. According to them, its because:

1) Apparently I'm too nice to be real (hidden intention?)
2) I somehow "stole" someone else friend
3) I have slightly better grades.

Of course that was two years ago but somehow I wonder if it still holds true today. Now every time I look into her eyes, I keep thinking, wondering because I think that even if I ask her directly, she won't give me a straight answer.

Some may think that I'm doing the "cutesy" act but I don't. Its just me being me. Period. I get where you're coming from but how to I change someone who I've been,still am and will be? I can't change who I am and how I act but is it that bad?

It hurts to care. Very much so. Its different before I met these people. To fit in, I had to learn to get along with people. Get to know their likes and dislikes. They are undoubtedly nice people but they are just different. We never clicked so I became somewhat distant.

That's why I felt happy because I finally meet wonderful people who are more of my type. Recently a friend and I had a talk, as honest as we can get.
Look I'm not asking people to like me but please understand. I'm simply me. I hope that from this point things will turn for the better. I hope.

Laughter gives us distance. It allows us to step back from an event, deal with it and then move on.